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THE FORMULA FOR ACHIEVING RESULTS- Part 2

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
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Achieving Results: Seven Insights  

Insight 1: Establish an outcome goal but then let it go because it isn’t in your athlete’s immediate control. What is? The process. The plan is everything.

The process starts and ends with the constant development of character. Daily focus on character building will shape your child’s life – on and off the playing fields. Character building develops your athlete’s inner voice through optimistic self-coaching. One of the most important jobs of a parent is to focus on character building through life skills.

Insight 2: Assist your athlete in developing calm, positive, proactive “self-talk.” This inner belief in themselves is the basis of the exact mental toughness they need at crunch time.

Your athlete’s inner voice is nurtured to either build them up to think clearly under duress or to tear them down and hinder their efforts at the most inopportune times. Often when things go south in competition, junior athletes allow their mind to drift away from the present process at hand (performance goals) and into past or future thoughts (outcome oriented thoughts). This is commonly followed by negative inner-chatter. Character building provides the optimistic scripts used to turn a possible disaster into another win.

Insight 3: Character building starts with the parents and coaches leading the way by letting go of the outcome results and reinforcing the process. How can we expect an adolescent to be performance oriented when their “guiding lights” are obsessed with only winning?

Great parents and coached educate the process of maintained discipline through chaos. Think about the last time your athlete was in competition. Remember feeling stressed for your athlete? Why? What were your thoughts that caused your pressure and anxiety? Was it past, present or future scenarios? Most likely the actual stress was caused by the long list of “What if’s?” What if they lose to this toad … What if they beat this top seed? What will they’re ranking move to? What will the coaches say? Will they get a Nike deal?

Insight 4: Focus on controlling the controllables versus focusing on the uncontrollables. In the competitive moment, is your athlete able to change past issues or forecast future issues? No, during competition, your athlete is only able to control the controllable – which is the present task at hand.

Parental focus should be on the effort and let go of results. Excellent physical, mental and emotional effort for the duration should be the entourage’s mission.

 

“Remember, there is a significant difference between excellence and perfection. Excellent effort is controllable. Perfection is a lie.”

 

Insight 5: Seek to educate your children to strive for excellence not perfection. The effort is in the process which will obtain winning results -not perfect results.

Your child’s success begins with preparing their character for the process of improvement. Only by achieving continuous improvement will your athlete be prepared when opportunity knocks. Unfortunately, many juniors get great opportunities but fail to capitalize, not because their lucky shorts were in the wash, but because they simply weren’t prepared.

 

Insight 6: Ask your athlete to complete a daily focus journal to assist them in self-coaching. Which of their components are weakest? Why? What would they suggest they could do differently to improve this weaknesses? The process of improvement needs a plan.

What drives your athlete to actually document their successes in their daily focus journal? What motivates them to wake up and put in the hard work? The answer is their moral compass, also known as their character. It’s their honest relationship and dialog with themselves that allows them to achieve their goals.

Insight 7: Character skills are life skills that parents can focus on daily. They include personal performance enhancers such as effort, dedication, time management, perseverance, resilience and optimism. They also include personal ethics such as honesty, appreciation, loyalty, trustworthiness, kindness, unselfishness and respect. Parental coaching starts here.

 

Let’s review. The formula for parents to assist in skyrocketing their athlete’s chances of achieving championship results is to begin with the character skills needed to implement their deliberate, customized developmental plan. An organized plan will be the foundation of the athletes accelerated growth. This is how you maximize your child’s potential as the quickest rate.

 

THE FORMULA FOR ACHIEVING RESULTS- Part 1

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

 Click Here to Order

 

frank

THE FORMULA FOR ACHIEVING RESULTS

 

All too often, competitive parents and athletes have dreams they mistake for goals. The disconnect starts with confusing dreams with goals. A dream is only a goal if it has an organized plan. For example, when I ask naturally talented athletes about their goals, they most often answer with uncontrollable outcome dreams. Such as: being ranked top in the nation, winning the state championship, receiving a NCAA D-1 athletic scholarship or playing pro ball.

These are nice dreams but remember:

 

“A goal without a deliberate customized developmental plan is actually a dream in disguise.”

 

Although elite athletes may also have the above dreams, the difference is that they realize their success is a result of quantifiable performance orientated process goals. It isn’t always the most naturally gifted athletes that are successful, it is the athletes with strong work ethics, resiliency and a plan. Below are seven insights that parents should apply while navigating their child’s pathway to greatness.

 

“Championship results are achieved by focusing on the process and the process starts with a plan.”

 

 

 

INTRODUCTION TO THE TENNIS PARENT’S JOB DESCRIPTION- Part 3

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
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POSITIVE VERSUS NEGATIVE PSYCHOLOGY

 

“Guidance from a coach or parent with a negative mindset is extremely toxic to a child.”

 

Exposing and destroying pessimistic beliefs and attitudes is an integral part of my daily mission, both personally and professionally. It’s your job as the tennis parent to eliminate these poisons from your athlete’s world.

Sadly, it’s often a parent, sibling, friend or coach that’s feeding the negative beliefs and pessimistic attitudes. It is in your best interest to remedy this issue or remove the negative source(s) from the child’s tennis entourage.

Parents, just as it is your duty to remove negative psychology, it is your responsibility to teach positive psychology. Teach belief and confidence, find their motivational buttons, develop their desire and hunger for mastering the game and teach them to embrace the challenge. These positive life lessons are part of raising athletic royalty.  If you teach the love of the game and the benefits of commitment, your athlete will progress seamlessly through the losses, technical difficulties, injuries and bad luck that come with athletics.

Allow the tennis teachers to teach, the coaches to coach and the trainers to train because as you know now, the tennis parent’s job description is far too comprehensive to micro manage each entourage’s role.

 

Mind Sets: Fixed versus Growth

Similar to the two sides of psychology, there are also two mind sets. Coaches often see student’s with either a fixed mind set or a growth mind set. While the athlete’s genetic predisposition is undoubtedly present, it’s most often the nurtured opinions of their parents, siblings and coaches that set their outlook.

  • A person with a debilitating fixed mind set truly believes that they cannot change. They are extremely rigid, view the world as black or white and are uninterested in change. Their unwillingness to accept new challenges often results in remaining average at best.
  • A person with a growth mind set believes that their opinions, outlooks, attitudes and abilities can and will change throughout their lives. Growth mind set individuals are more willing and open to accept change in the name of progress/improvement.

 

“Raising athletic royalty is a direction, not a destination. What you choose to teach your children now will live on for generations to come.”

 

I find that parents who encourage both positive psychology and a growth mind set are developing much more than a future athlete, they are developing future leaders.

 

 

INTRODUCTION TO THE TENNIS PARENT’S JOB DESCRIPTION- Part 2

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

 Click Here to Order

Frank Giampaolo

 

THE THREE PHASES OF ATHLETE DEVELOPMENT

 

Once you’ve discovered which type of tennis parent you want to be, the next step is to identify which phase of development best categorizes your child’s current level. All too often, parents have an unrealistic view of their child’s current phase of development.  This is a result of the parent’s lack of awareness into the developmental process.

Due to personality profiles, growth development schedules and maturity levels, I don’t like to pigeon-hole athletes based on their age. At each level, customization is encouraged. It is very common to find mature 9 year olds in phase 3 and immature 17 year olds in phase 1. Customization is the key.

 

The Introductory Phase:

In this stage of the game, children are sampling many sports. The primary objective is enjoyment while developing sound fundamentals.

Special Note: I’m a firm believer that proper motor programming is essential. Allowing a child to groove poor mechanics only to spend thousands of wasted dollars, hours and tears fixing them later doesn’t make sense. You can still laugh and have fun while developing world class strokes.

The Developmental Phase:

Also known as the intermediate phase. In this stage, tennis is the main hobby. Social clinics are the norm. Specialized training has begun and juniors are experiencing sectional tournament play.

Special Note: This is when the parents, uneducated in the process unintentionally push talented athletes away from the sport by allowing them to train like a hobbyist and then expect the child to be getting championship results.

The Break-Through Phase:

In this stage, athletes are dedicated to the sport and are engaged in full time training. Each component of the game is developed as the athlete begins to invest in the future. Players begin to look towards National level or ITF level events to secure a college tennis scholarship at a major university.

Special Note: This is when a shift from hardware development (strokes and athleticism) to software development (mental and emotional) is most often needed.

 

 

INTRODUCTION TO THE TENNIS PARENT’S JOB DESCRIPTION- Part 1

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

 Click Here to Order

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INTRODUCTION TO THE TENNIS PARENT’S JOB DESCRIPTION

 

“The parent is the architect of their child’s tennis career.”

 

Experts agree that there is a great need for an organizational blue-print for tennis parents, as well as parents of athlete’s in every chosen sport.  Until now, the role of the tennis parent has been controversial and mysterious. The ultimate quest of the The Tennis Parent’s Bible’s is to empower the tennis parent by defining their role. In my experience, a large percentage of the parents that I have worked with were optimistic and willing to learn about the tennis developmental process; while a small percentage of the tennis parents were perfectionists, pessimistic and unwilling to consider the possibility that their methods were counterproductive toward the athletic growth of their child.

 

“If you’re a bit of a perfectionist, this book is aimed at making you a “Recovering Perfectionists.”

 

Serious harmful consequences result from well-intended perfectionists’ imposing their beliefs and actions on their children, which ultimately poisons their children with negativity and an unwillingness to accept change which stunts their growth.

Listed below are the three types of tennis parents. The first group probably wouldn’t even pick up a book like this because their ego wouldn’t allow them to possibly be proven wrong – of course they already know all there is to know.  The second and third type of tennis parent shares my interest in raising athletic royalty. Let’s take a peek at the three types of tennis parent to see where you fit in.

 

Three Types of Tennis Parent’s

1) The Under Involved Parent:

  • The only sports they are passionate about is their own.
  • 100% sure that they already know it all and aren’t interested in learning more.
  • Unaware of the life lessons learned through sports.
  • Seek zero accountability for their child’s growth.
  • Oblivious towards their children’s personal desires.
  • Unable to attend weekend tournaments due to their heavy social calendar.
  • Unwilling to spend money on their child’s tennis.
  • Views their child’s sports as an inconvenience and a waste of time.

2) The CEO Facilitator Parent:

  • Educated about the process of raising athletic royalty.
  • Realizes that commitment demands long, mid and short term goal setting.
  • Understands the positive emotional demands of the parent and athlete.
  • Understands the logistical organizational demands of the parents/player/encourage.
  • Understands the lesson, clinics, sparring and tournament scheduling demands.
  • Understands the invaluable life lessons learned through participating in sports.

3) The Over Involved Parent:

  • Places too much emphasis on winning every drill, practice set and match.
  • Attempts to coach the athlete with no real coaching background.
  • Overly negative, pessimistic and critical.
  • Seeks a return on their financial investment.
  • Over-reacts to errors and losses.
  • Live vicariously through their child’s success.
  • Obsessed with the game and how it benefits their personal “agenda.”

 

A family’s moral code and developmental climate has a lifelong effect on the athlete, whether the parents know it or not. Because parents and coaches are so influential in shaping their young athletes, I urge you to take an optimistic approach to raising athletic royalty. It is my hopes that by reading this book you’ll fall into the CEO facilitator role of a world class tennis parent.

 

The Tennis Parent Mission Statement:

 

“I vow to create a positive experience for my child by providing optimistic emotional guidance, logistical,
organizational & financial support as I oversee my child’s entourage of coaches.”

THE COLLEGE SEARCH PROCESS

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

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Frank Giampaolo

THE COLLEGE SEARCH PROCESS

 

As a tennis parent, the long term development and direction of your athlete is a natural concern. The serious tennis players will likely set their sights on playing college ball. So it is not surprising that week in and week out, one of the most frequent question parents ask me, is how to go about obtaining a college sports scholarship for their child?

First of all, college sports are not recreational activities to dabble in while attending college.  College athletics is a business and the school expects their college team to win.

There’s a major difference between participating in your preferred sport as a hobbyist versus training for college athletics (pursuing a college scholarship). The question athletes should ask themselves is, “Do I want to be a hobbyist athlete or do I want to be an elite athlete?” The truth of the matter is…you’ll have to pick one, because you can’t be both.

 

“Top college recruits are former National orITF Junior standouts.”

 

Serious competitors are nurtured differently than social competitors. College athletics requires more than seasonal participation in high school ball. The following list three pillars that separate the college scholarship players from the hobbyist:

1) Junior champions are born into inspiring and supportive environments.

Parental support is essential for athletic excellence. Becoming educated in the process is your job. Great coaches and trainers are there to assist you in your mission to raise a champion. Examples of extremely lucky athletes who were born into the right FAMILY environment include: Mcllroy, Woods, Phelps, Evert, Agassi, Chang, Sampras, Hingis, Roddick, Williams, Murray, Nadal, Federer, Sharapova, Wosniacki, Djokovic and Bryans just to name a few.

 

2) The love for the game is encouraged and nurtured early and consistently.

Athletic royalty becomes royalty with the help of loving and supportive parents and coaches that guide and oversee their athlete’s passion from an early age. Achieving greatness comes with great sacrifice from parents, coaches and the athlete. As they all laugh and learn throughout the incredible journey.

3) Champions strive to improve.

Elite athletes continually improve each essential component. There are other athletes in every corner of the globe training harder and smarter each day.  Champions know they cannot be complacent with their game.  Weekly improvement is part of the champions’ mindset. Congratulations! By purchasing this book, it is obvious that you are taking the right steps toward improvement.

 

College Athletics:

If college athletics is your child’s goal, it is in your best interest to begin preparing early. Putting off serious training until your child is in high school is most often too late.

 

“The ultimate goal for a high school age athlete is to be in the “Buyer’s Market.”

 

The Buyers’ Market versus the Sellers’ Market:

The buyers’ market means your child has focused on developing their skills and achieving athletic royalty (Top National or ITF ranking) and the top college coaches are not only aware of them, they are heavily recruit them in a bidding war.

It is important to understand that if you and your child have waited to get serious about their sport until high school age, you will most likely be in the “Seller’s Market.” In essence, as a parent, your job will be to “sell” your child’s possible value to the coach. Your child is now one of thousands of talented but unproven athletes vying for the leftover scraps of scholarship funds. If you think the task of “selling” your child’s skills is tough, wait until you have to write those dreaded big checks for their education. If you build a champion the coaches will come to you!

 

“Get ahead of the crowd early by applying a deliberate, customized development plan. Successful college athletic careers are preceded by years
and years of successful preparation.”

 

Preparing for college early will not only brings the college scholarship offers to you, it may even help you open a door that may have otherwise been closed. For example, Ivy League schools do not offer athletic scholarships but your child’s tennis may give them the admittance edge over other students with similar or even higher academic profiles.

 

For more details regarding the college search process, please visit my dedicated eBook: How to Attract a College Athletic Scholarship

It has everything you didn’t even know…you needed to know! www.maximizingtennispotential.com

ESTABLISHING EXPECTATIONS AND GUIDELINES

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

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ESTABLISHING EXPECTATIONS AND GUIDELINES

 

“Being coachable is when the eagerness to improve over-rides the fear of change.”

 

Parents and coaches, plan on communicating your expectations to your athlete and entourage of coaches and trainers to develop an important alliance with the team. Defining the behaviors you expect from your athlete’s during both practice as well as in match play will pave the road for excellence in tennis and in life. This is especially important in the beginner and intermediate levels of the game.

 

My Top Twenty Tennis Coaching/Parental Expectations:

  • Place effort and improvement over having to win the match, social game or live ball drill.
  • On the court be grateful, enthusiastic and polite.
  • Arrive 10 minutes before your scheduled practice session to prepare.
  • Arrive on court dressed and ready to compete.
  • Avoid complaining or criticizing others.
  • Give the coach your best efforts and your undivided attention.
  • When the coach is talking, hold the balls. Stop, look him/her in the eyes and listen.
  • No cell phones allowed on court.
  • Move quickly between drills and during ball pick up – yes, the student helps pick up balls!
  • Hustle and give 100% effort.
  • Avoid negative tones, body language and facial expressions.
  • Avoid using profanity.
  • Admit mistakes and understand the cause of the error.
  • Come to practice with a pre-set game plan and an eagerness to learn.
  • Be open to constructive criticism.
  • Be willing to develop your weaknesses.
  • Stay fully committed and focused for the entire training session.
  • Rehearse staying focused and in a positive frame of mind for the entire training session.
  • Be aware of mistake management and unforced error accountability.
  • Practice in the manner you are expected to perform.

 

“Choosing to train below their capability breeds mediocrity.”

 

Athletes training without their deliberate, customized developmental plan in mind may be putting in high quantity, low quality work. This stunts their growth and tremendously minimizes any chance at performing at full potential.

IDENTIFYING THE LEVELS OF COMPETITIVE TENNIS

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IDENTIFYING THE LEVELS OF COMPETITIVE TENNIS

 

Recreational tennis is enjoyed around the world. The emphasis is on exercise, fundamental athletic skills, tons of fun, wearing the outfits, participation by all and social interactions. As skills are developed the recreational and social game is replaced by a new game called competitive tennis.

Different United States Tennis Association (USTA) sections proudly offer their unique versions of junior social competition in the forms of junior leagues, club junior teams and high school junior varsity levels. As players progress, they graduate to sectional competition in the forms of satellite tournaments, novice tournaments, open level tournaments, high school varsity, invitational or designated events. Players reaching the higher levels of their sectional events graduate to the national 1, 2 and 3 level events.

(Please visit USTA.com to familiarize yourself with the current eligibility rules and regulations of your section.)

Another “league” to consider is the International Tennis Federation (ITF) group of events. This international tour is becoming a popular path for families seeking to experience great competition while seeing the world. This junior league series consists of levels ranging from 5 (the lowest) to 1 (the highest). Athletes at the top of the standings are eligible to participate in the prestigious Grand Slam junior events.

In both the USTA and the ITF leagues, at the approximate age of 15, competitive juniors begin to shift their focus toward college tennis. On rare occasions, the world’s best youngsters begin to try their luck at the minor league levels of the professional game.

 

Juniors winning national titles or establishing a high ITF ranking earn the right to be offered the elusive wild card entries into Pro events. Contact your local sectional offices for information on eligibility for wildcards as well as their wildcard request forms.

NURTURING ATHLETIC ROYALTY

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

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Frank Giampaolo

NURTURING ATHLETIC ROYALTY

 

Parents, let’s take a moment and focus now on you. One of the most critical parental failures committed while raising athletic royalty is the way in which some parents choose to navigate their world.

 

“Kids tend to copy your actions and ignore your wishes.”

 

This is called modeling. The way you handle situations speaks volumes to your children. Your attitude, thoughts and daily moral code is being imprinted into your child’s psyche every hour of every day.

While on a recent coaching trip to the Island of Tobago, for an International Tennis Federation event, I had the opportunity to meet two fathers with opposing personality profiles; Mr. Vincent Lorenzo and Mr. Olson White.  Both fathers had kids competing in the tournament, they were both in their mid-40’s, slightly balding and carrying a few extra pounds.  Ironically, they both resided in New Jersey.

Like South Florida, tropical rain fall came like clockwork in Tobago. During the daily rain delays we spoke for hours on end under the tournament tent. I found that while the sons of Mr. Lorenzo and Mr. White had similar training environments, their inner sanctuary proved to be polar opposites.

 

The following are my observations after spending three days with the two east coast dads:

 

Mr Lorenzo fosters trust and belief in people. His New Jersey neighbor, Mr. White rolls his eyes and doubts everything and everyone. Mr. Lorenzo thinks things through, decides on an action plan and acts. Mr. White freezes, hesitates, over thinks about every possible failure and then fails to act in a timely manner.  Mr. Lorenzo focuses on the solution to a problem while Mr. White only complains about the same problem for hours and hours on end.

Mr Lorenzo prepares protocols to handle difficult situations beforehand. Mr. White has prepared dozens of excuses. Mr. Lorenzo is fine with working and earning his way through the world. Mr. White wishes and hopes he’ll win the lottery. While others talk, Mr. Lorenzo listens and retains pertinent information that may prove meaningful in the future, while Mr. White rolls his eyes, believing he already knows it all, and doesn’t bother to listen because he is too busy thinking of a way to one-up the others.

Mr. Lorenzo plans and visualizes success and Mr. White obsesses and complains about how nothing ever seems to work out for him.

Now, put yourself in the shoes of a NCAA coach with scholarship funds left to give away. Without ever meeting their boys, would you pick young Tony Lorenzo or young Stanley White?

Top coaches try to interview and spend time with the parents and junior coaches of their prospects to understand what’s being nurtured into the athlete. After all, the coach will have to deal with the baggage that comes along with the recruits.

 

“Great athletes are nurtured differently than good athletes.”

Parents, remember that an experienced coach can teach the technical nuances of a sport. A dedicated trainer can assist in building strong muscles and stamina. But you are your child’s life skills master teacher. Pay attention to your attitude, thoughts and actions because great athletes are nurtured differently than good athletes.

Key to Tennis Coaching Excellence

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

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frank

 

 

PLAYER-COACH: INITIAL INFORMATION EXCHANGE

Most often, coaches begins their relationship with feeding balls and correcting fundamentals. I encourage coaches to begin their relationship by asking questions and truly listening to their students.  Maximizing player potential starts by uncovering the athlete’s personality, feelings, attitude and tennis IQ. This will aid in customizing the training regiments. Similar personality profiles shares common efficiency and deficiencies. Knowing the athlete’s personality profile will save hundreds of wasted hours in the developmental process. Encourage your athlete’s coach to engage in this type of information exchange. It will surely sets the tone for a positive relationship. Remember, all behavior is communicative so be aware of the nonverbal clues.

 

Nonverbal Clues Checklist:

  • Facial Expression
  • Body Language/Posture
  • Volume/Intonation
  • Choice of Words
  • Length of Thought Process
  • Length of Answers
  • Exact/Approximate Answers
  • Hand Gestures
  • Lower Body/Core Movement
  • Length of Focus

 

20 Assessment Questions:

  1. What level/division are you playing?
  2. Do you have a club, section, National or ITF ranking?
  3. Tell me about your athletic history?
  4. What are your short and long-term tennis goals?
  5. Tell me about your tennis entourage (parents/coaches)?
  6.  What’s your current weekly training regimen?
  7. What’s your primary and secondary styles of play?
  8. Tell me about your pre-match preparation?
  9. What style of opponent do you hate to play the most?
  10.  Are you patient or inpatient on court?
  11. What’s your shot tolerance level (comfortable length of point)?
  12. Do you respond after reasoning or before reasoning?
  13. Do you allow the opponent to self-destruct or do you preferred to strike bold winners?
  14. How well do you deal with intimidation, confrontation/gamesmanship?
  15. Do you enjoy surprises or avoid surprises?
  16. Are you comfortable being spontaneous/unscripted or deliberate/regimented?
  17. Are you inspired by the real/practical or imaginative/what could be?
  18. Do your thoughts wander between the past, present and the future?
  19. What’s your focus tolerance level (how long can you focus on a singular topic)?
  20. Do you think you’re getting the results you deserve?

 

Throughout this book, you will hear that it is the job of the parents and coaches to get into the athlete’s world as opposed to forcing the athlete into our world. Understanding why your athlete thinks the way they think and do what they do is a function of their genetic predisposition.