The following post is an exce
rpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible NOW available through most on-line retailers! Click Here to Order
Ignoring Your Non-Verbal Communication
In Malcolm Gladwell’s book, Blink, he shares an interesting insight regarding surgeons who make medical mistakes. The bottom line is that the surgeons with top credentials, but poor bedside manners, are more likely to get sued then are the surgeons with the same credentials, making the same mistake, but with terrific bedside manners.
A parent or coach with a condescending tone of voice, a disgusted facial expression or even negative body language, is often the trigger that sets your child into a defensive position. Studies show that up to 70 percent of communication is nonverbal.
We initially believe that we are helping our children by spotting every single problem and bringing it to light. This “tough love” isn’t in their best interest. Instead, parents, if you want dynamic results, along with a happier child, try adding positive power words to your tennis talks. Examples include: Great attitude; You’re so brave; Terrific energy, You’re playing fearless; It’s so fun watching you perform; You have guts; You motivate me; You look strong out there; I’m so proud of you!
After all, isn’t that what you wanted to hear from your folks? Every child needs to hear these positive statements from their parents.
