The following post is an excerpt from The Tennis Parent’s Bible. Thank you, Frank
Confidence is Like Friendship
A meaningful friendship is founded on time, energy and hard work. The same components are found in true confidence.
Lack of confidence issues such as self-doubt and/or a negative self-image arise from how athletes view past experiences. Often, when asking an adolescent what happened during competition they reply “I don’t know, I’m horrible!”
Getting to the root of the issue is done by organizing tournament experiences using match logs. Champions have experienced losing hundreds of times more often than your junior player. The difference is how they view it.
So, how should your daughter view tournament competition? Junior tennis tournaments in general should be viewed as information gathering missions. Success lies in doubling your child’s level of competence every six months. They have to be twice as good as they were six months ago. Replace focusing on winning with focusing on improving every week.
Lack of confidence is a common issue. It sneaks into every athlete in every sport. Lack of confidence usually occurs when:
- Not training or being trained improperly
- Injured or illness
- Returning to the game after an injury or illness
- Underperformed in recent competition
- Burnt out
- Players in a slump may be under achieving in more than one of these issues simultaneously.
Rebuilding Confidence
Confidence is a progressive spiral of positive input which leads to positive attitude. True belief and trust is earned by doing everything in your power to be the best you can be. So let’s first look deeper at ten common stepping stones that will rekindle your child’s confidence:
- Re-commit to Getting Fit
Tennis specific speed, agility and stamina are key. Cross training is terrific. Hit the gym, hit the track and get physically stronger!
- Clear the Mind
Re-focus on tennis! Teens can get derailed by numerous factors. School, parties, peer pressure, other sports, hobbies, shopping…etc.
- Proper Nutrition/Hydration
It takes just 1-2% dehydration and the body is impaired mentally and physically. This could take effect with blurred vision, mental confusion, headaches, cramping etc. As for proper nutrition, the body needs high quality protein and carbohydrates at the right time to function most efficiently.
- Customize the Instruction
“Practice in the manner in which you are expected to perform”. Build a game plan around exposing your child’s strengths while hiding her weaknesses. Customize her style to her brain and body type.
- Promote and Educate Independence
Independent problem solving promotes confidence on and off the court. Even though some parents think they are helping, it may be wise to slowly stop doing everything for your little phenom.
- Surround Them with Supportive People
Positive coaches, trainers and friends with character are key. Is her new boyfriend pulling her focus in a new direction? Do her new friends at school want to party and shop all the time? Is his coach pessimistic or negative?
- Help Others
Ask your daughter to assist the local food bank once a month and feed the homeless. Seeing the positive attitude of someone less fortunate reminds them of their terrific fortune.
- Avoid Negative Comments
This is any advice or stimuli that are perceived as unfavorable. The key word here is perceived. We find that derogatory comments, tone of voice, body language or even facial expressions can tear down a sensitive player’s confidence.
Examples: A friend telling your daughter “You play Amanda next? Oh no… Nobody ever beats her. She won two nationals and is ranked in the top 5!”
A coach saying ” You’re going to run 20 laps if you miss another backhand. Just do it right!”
A parent saying after a tournament loss “You always make so many errors, maybe you should quit!”
- Proper Warm Up and Pre Match Routines
Confidence comes from rituals. Warming up all the primary and secondary strokes. This includes swing volleys short angles, top spin lobs…etc. Proper nutrition, hydration, scouting, visualization, and going for a short run before you go on the court.
- Perfectionists Set the Bar Too High
Unrealistic expectations kill confidence. Parents, just because your son won last week’s tournament, don’t expect him to win every one from now on!
Players, a sure fire way to disable your confidence is to expect perfection. Even if you are in the zone for a while, it is a borrowed experience. No one owns the zone. No one stays in the zone and lives there year around.
Parents, ask your player to read through these ten common confidence busters. Do any of them apply to your child? If so, customize a plan to erase them from their preparation and performances!
Thanks for visiting, Frank Giampaolo
Contact: Frank Giampaolo
FGSA@earthlink.net
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