Tag Archives: Frank Giampaolo

MANAGING EMOTIONS

The Tennis Parent’s Bible
CLICK HERE to Order

COMING SOON: The Tennis Encyclopedia

The Challenge of Change

To substitute one behavior for another sounds so easy, but it’s not. Our emotional responses are habits that are hardwired in our brains. Altering the wiring takes time. Plan on training to rewire the new skill sets for months before they override the deep seeded poor habits holding you hostage. Change begins as an inward journey of understanding. Reinventing your emotional climate affects your new thoughts, feeling, and actions come match day.

“Nothing can harm you as much as yourself in a tennis match.”

1.1 Letting Go of Past Habits

To “unmemorized” past emotional responses, you’ll recondition your belief system. Nothing can harm you as much as yourself in a tennis match. Are you ready to break the habit of being yourself in matches and reinvent a new competitive self?

1.2 Tournament Personality Traits

Athletes under stress have almost the same thoughts today that they did yesterday. Here’s a fact:

Most thoughts in competition are repetitive. After repeating the same response, it becomes your competitive temperament. Those temperaments then become your tournament personality trait. These traits reappear like clockwork as soon as matches begin.

1.3 Neural Pathways

We create a neural pathway if we do something often enough, including reacting negatively. The more we repeat the behavior, the stronger the connection in the brain. This neural pathway is how our habits get formed and why breaking a bad habit is so challenging.

1.4 Cascading Emotions

Every positive or negative thought we have creates a cascade of effects. Are your old negative emotional routines keeping you comfortable or holding you captive? When you slow down between points, you reduce negative thoughts and reset. Only then can you experience mental clarity.

1.5 Coping Skills

Taking control starts with understanding your coping skills. Under pressure, are you in a coping mindset or an escaping mindset? Coping is refusing to act like a victim and taking positive action. Escaping is avoidance of the solutions.

1.6 The Four Stages of Change

Choosing to make a change and develop a new emotional state is a process that generally requires the passage through four stages:

  1. Disbelief
  2. Frustration
  3. Acceptance
  4. Commitment

Let’s begin the inward journey toward understanding your emotions. The following chapters will explore how you leave disbelief and anger behind and enter the acceptance and commitment stages.

The Power of the Mind in Tennis

The Tennis Parent’s Bible
CLICK HERE to Order

COMING SOON

THE TENNIS ENCYCLOPEDIA!

The Power of the Mind

If thoughts can cause stress…then thoughts can cause comfort. It’s a choice.”

The game of tennis is a delicate dance between the physical and the mental. While athleticism and technical skills are undoubtedly crucial, the power of the mind truly sets apart the champions from the rest.

1.1 Understanding the Mind-Body Connection

Tennis requires synchronization between the mind and the body. Every physical movement and decision on the court is a product of the mind-body connection.

Emotions also trigger thoughts that positively or negatively impact an athlete’s coordination and biochemistry. Poor emotions hijack the mind under pressure leaving athletes stranded alone and unable to compete.

1.2 Exploring the Impact of Feelings, Thoughts, and Beliefs

Our thoughts and feelings are our way of dealing with pressure. These feelings can be true or false. It’s important to note that our feelings aren’t always real. Often these conditioned emotional responses are merely speculations. As a competitive athlete, your thoughts condition your habits, and your habits shape your beliefs.

1.3 False Assumptions

Your negative habits may include pessimistic self-talk, self-doubt, or unwanted limiting beliefs that stall progress and hold you back from playing at your peak potential. On the other hand, your positive thoughts, empowering beliefs, and a strong mental attitude can propel you past your fears and toward the skills we know you must master.

1.4 Neuroplasticity

Neuroplasticity is the ability of the brain to reorganize old connections. So, with time and effort, you can reroute poor habits such as untrustworthy stroke techniques or how to respond to adversity.

1.5 Embracing Neuroplasticity

Embracing the concept of Neuroplasticity will involve walking away from old comfortable habits and trading them in for uncomfortable, superior choices.

1.6 Embracing Discomfort

You can rewire your neural pathways and reshape your thinking patterns through deliberate practice and mental conditioning. Discomfort is a catalyst for growth.

Neuroplasticity teaches us that age-old excuse of “I can’t” just got thrown out the window. You can make changes, and this book will teach you how.

1.7 Tackling Discomfort

I promise you, being uncomfortable is a normal and healthy part of progress. If you genuinely want to improve, it can’t be avoided. A better future isn’t created from what you’ve chosen to do in your past but from what you haven’t tried yet. Doing what is comfortable is typical. Doing what’s uncomfortable is where mastery lives.

“A better future isn’t created from what you’ve chosen to do in your past but from what you haven’t tried yet.”

Customizing Your Developmental Tennis Plan

The Tennis Parent’s Bible
CLICK HERE to Order

Developing Your Competitive Persona

Jackie’s a hard-hitting baseliner. Her shot tolerance is 3-4 balls. Jackie is an intuitive player who likes to hit bold winners and can overtake most competitors with her huge serve and big forehands. However, her coach is from South America. The Spanish system nurtured him by being steady and retrieving balls with high-quality defense. He played that style. He understands that style and demands all his students to train within those guidelines. Is this the correct approach for Jackie?

Persona refers to our identity as competitive warriors. It relates to how we perceive and label ourselves in competitive events. It’s essential to be faithful to that which exists within.

2.1 Play Your Game

Parents and coaches often say, “Just go out there and play your game!” Do you know your game? Most players don’t honestly know. This section will help shape your tennis persona.

2.2 Developing Your Competitive Identity

Crucial to achieving long-term success is knowing your tennis identity. Do you know your best style of play in competition? What are your go-to patterns and best court positions? Do you have your offense, neutral, and defense protocols memorized?

2.3 Your Personal Brand

Your competitive identity is your personal brand on the tennis court, enabling you to do what you do best when it matters most. It’s handling adversity, problem-solving, and approaching your training and competition.

2.4 Developing Your Identity

Developing your tennis identity goes beyond fundamental strokes and natural talent. It also involves building resilience and developing decision-making skills. Tennis is an emotionally challenging sport, and your ability to handle pressure and maintain a positive mindset will significantly affect your success.

2.5 Inborn Talents

Inborn strengths and weaknesses mold your competitive identity. Recognizing and using your inborn talents will help to customize a game plan that plays to your strengths while minimizing your weaknesses.

2.6 Prioritizing Time

Balancing commitments requires developing strong organizational skills and learning to manage time effectively. The best competitors learn how to prioritize their commitments.

2.7 Optimal Habits

Optimal habits are the routines that help you to maximize your potential. An example of an optimal habit is setting weekly “stepping stone” goals, working to reach these goals, and then setting more goals the following week. The main goal is to strive for massive improvement. By doing so first, results appear.

Every choice you make either pulls you away from greatness or pushes you toward it. Applying your identity under pressure requires knowing who you are and what you do best. The best players customize their training versus the old-school, one size fits all approach.

Tennis- The Psychology of Listening

The Psychology of Tennis Parenting
CLICK HERE to Order

The Psychology of Listening

For a youngster to mentally process your message, the athlete must pay attention to the essence of the ideas. Most children never get past their parent’s tone of voice and nonverbal clues. Digesting the message isn’t easy for most junior athletes. Once the message is perceived as negative, they stop listening. So use a bit of reverse psychology and apply optimistic solutions instead of the laundry list of their problems. This method detaches the athlete from their ego.

Young athletes are typically lost in their judgmental thoughts, so the listener often distorts the message.

“One who understands what to say has knowledge; one who understands when to say it has wisdom.”

Magnifying the negative and forgetting the positive is a typical communication obstruction. Every athlete, parent, and coach have a unique communication style. There are four basic communication styles (passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and dominating). It’s important to understand that if your style isn’t working, change your communication system to fit your listener.

Solution: Understand your communication system. Try to downgrade your tone of voice to a calm, relaxed cadence to get your meaning heard. When choosing to discuss their failures, switch the problems with the solutions. Add player accountability to problem-solving using the “Ask, don’t tell.” teaching method. After all, top athletes are nurtured to solve their problems.

Try to focus on giving without expecting, argue less, stop comparing your child with their peers, avoid participating in gossip, eliminate judgment, and choose not to live vicariously through your child.

Tennis Rudimentary Anticipation

The Psychology of Tennis Parenting
CLICK HERE to Order

Rudimentary Anticipation

Anticipatory speed is one of the mental components that we need to teach much earlier. Anticipation is linked to cause and effect. It is based on the understanding that each shot hit in a match has finite responses from the opponent across the net. Experience gives athletes feedback, and the athletes who pay attention mentally log those responses. The mentally tough players log their winning and losing trends into their memory, which they use to anticipate where the ball will likely be in the future.

The more matches your athlete plays, the more they can apply subconscious programming. Because there are only milliseconds between shots in tennis, our athletes need recognition by intuition. There isn’t sufficient time to analyze the situation and set the proper shot selections and motor programs into play. Athletes build memory logs of data and feedback. Once the experience of going through similar events takes place, anticipation is applied.

Solution: Parents and coaches would be wise to start to develop their young athlete’s anticipatory skills at an early age with this rudimentary three-step process. (Examples are assuming both athletes are right-handed)

  • Returning Serves: Be mindful of the opponent’s ball toss. When they toss out in front to the right, the serve is most likely to go to your athlete’s right, which is their forehand. If the opponent tosses back over their head, to their left, it’s most likely going to your athlete’s backhand.
  • Rallies: Pay close attention to the opponent’s strike zone. A waste-level ball is typically hit with an offensive drive. A low, sock-level strike zone is often a slice reply. A head-level strike zone stroke usually falls short.
  • Volleys: Be aware that a high, shoulder-level volley is typically hit with pace and cross-court. An opponent’s low volley is usually a drop volley.
  • Identify Offensive, Neutral and Defensive Situations: Opponents who commit fewer unforced errors play high-percentage tennis. They do this by understanding zonal tennis and attempting to hit the shot the moment demands.

Once these foundational anticipatory clues are established, ask your athlete to log match clues between point routines and changeover rituals.

Run Toward the Fire

The Psychology of Tennis Parenting
CLICK HERE to Order

Run Toward the Fire

Tennis players that rise to the occasion in those pressure-packed finals have courage and confidence in themselves and their training. These athletes tackle problems head-on and cope with the hardships of the sport in an unstressed fashion. Developing mental and emotional strength is essential for long-term tennis goals. Share with your athlete this analogy.

Ask them to think of themselves as a firefighter. Firefighters walk into the fire versus running away from it. Regarding your athlete’s fears, I recommend asking them to do the same. It’s human nature to avoid scary situations, so you’ll have to show your athlete how to face fears. If your child avoids difficult moments like closing out a set versus a better player, they’ll crumble in those moments unless they are trained to regulate their emotional state. Does this require exposure to the stressor or avoidance?

Solution: Athletes who thrive under pressure replace their mechanical thoughts like how they are hitting their forehand, backhand, serve and volley with focusing on emotional essentials such as managing momentum, maintaining intensity, focusing on the here and now, and retaining their positive mindset.

While solid strokes get the athlete into the events, the additional software skills enable them to hold up another trophy.

Self-Sabotage

The Psychology of Tennis Parenting
CLICK HERE to Order

Frank Giampaolo

“Run Towards Winning Versus Running Away from Losing.”

Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is an “inside job.” If your athlete is their own worst enemy in competition, the issue likely lies in the relationship between your athlete’s conscious and subconscious mind. The conscious mind is the analytical, neurotic part of each athlete’s personality. It wants to help so badly that it causes problems. The issues occur because the conscious mind is constantly editing and evaluating every aspect of the performance. It is rarely possible to get into the zone and stay in that flow state if the athlete is editing too much during competition. You see, great competitors apply effortless effort. Meaning they’re putting out effort without the worry.

The subconscious mind is easygoing. It trusts the fact that it has performed these routines thousands of times. It’s the automatic pilot relaxed performer. Gifted athletes choke and panic at the most inopportune times because their conscious mind is overthinking and worrying about the possibility of future failure. This catastrophic way of thinking becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Stressing out about the possibility of future failure causes dopamine and adrenaline to flood the body systems as fear and muscle tension take center stage. Too many of these released hormones hijack an athlete’s brain.

Solution: Remind your athlete that it’s a privilege to be able to play tennis. Worrying about the outcome brings unwanted visitors through the conscious judgmental mind. Ask your athlete to observe their performance and make adjustments without judging. Before competition, preset solutions to possible future problems. Accepting an excellent performance versus a perfect performance is a great start to distressing an athlete. Great performances are born in inner silence.

Did You Win?

The Psychology of Tennis Parenting
CLICK HERE to Order

Did You Win?

It is incredible how much self-inflicted contamination is created daily by parents and junior tennis players. Here is a prime example: what is the worst question parents can ask after practice sets or a match? The answer was, “Did you win?” Now guess what the most common question parents ask after practice sets or a match is? You guessed it, “Did you win?”

Parents need to replace an outcome obsession with improvement questions like: “Did you perform well today?” Remind your athlete that their real competition is in their mirror, and the only person they have to beat is the person they were last week. Asking your athlete, “Did you win?” pulls them away from focusing on their daily improvement goals and towards outcome goals because of the need for your love and approval. Athletes stressed about proving their worth to their parents are not free to focus on improving their untrustworthy skills. Athletes in this “winning is everything.” mindset only applies the comfortable skills they already own, not to disappoint their parents. This behavior stunts the growth parents seek.

Solution: Exchange the “Did you win?” question with performance-based inquiries. Another typical tennis parent blunder is booking their athletes into practice sets with higher-ranked players and then being crazy upset when their child does not win. Practice sets are learning tools to strengthen your athlete’s match play skills and identify those skills that are not ready for prime time.

If the parent is constantly in need of wins and a shelf full of plastic trophies, schedule sets with lower-ranked individuals and only register your child into low-level event.

Life Skills Through Tennis

The truth is, most often, sports don’t teach life skills; they expose them. Competition reveals underdeveloped life skills; the athlete has to be taught how to improve that individual skill set.

If you’re paying a technical coach to fix stroke mechanics, please don’t assume they’re teaching your kids life skills. The common misconception is that your child’s coaches are teaching those critical abilities. Most often, parents assume that the coaches are educating life skills, and the coaches assume that the parents are teaching them. Guess what? No one is.

Solution: Psychosocial competence or life skills are abilities and behaviors that enable athletes to deal with the demands and challenges of competition on and off the tennis court. Be mindful of who’s developing the character traits of your child daily. The type of individual your child becomes is dictated by who is nurturing them.

PERFORMANCE ANXIETIES IN TENNIS-PART 1

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible
Available through most online retailers!

 Click Here to Order

frank

PERFORMANCE ANXIETIES

 

“Juniors need to understand that during matches, negative emotions come and go like flights landing and taking off from an airport. They can choose to hop on the looney flight or simply let it take off without them.”

 

During match play, negative emotions reveal fear and insecurity, while positive emotions reveal confidence and control. The ability to control one’s emotions is a critical high performance skill.  Emotional intelligence is a learned behavior.

 

“Emotional Development is just as important as stroke development.”

 

Below, I’ve listed four categories of common performance anxiety symptoms.  If you suspect that your child’s fear of competition, confrontation or adversity is affecting their performance, it may be time to gather the coaches for an emotional training session. Ask your child to check any below symptoms that they feel describes them on match day. Design a new action plan to overcome each issue.

 

Match Day Symptoms

Physical Symptoms:

  • Shallow, fast breathing
  • Increased muscle tension throughout the body
  • Increased perspiration
  • Feeling dizzy and weak in the knees
  • Feeling that your body is on the court but your mind is somewhere else

Mental Symptoms:

  • Inability to focus one point at a time
  • Over thinking (choking)
  • Under thinking (panicking)
  • Reoccurring thoughts of failure
  • Worrying about others opinions of their performance
  • Obsessing about others rankings & successes

Emotional Symptoms:

  • Self-doubt in strokes as seen in “pushing”
  • Self-doubt in stamina & strength as seen in reckless shot selection (to end points prematurely)
  • Nervousness, hesitation & fearful performance
  • Stressing about uncontrollable variables
  • Not taking the time to enjoy the moment

Behavioral Symptoms:

  • Not performing match day routines & rituals
  • Hurrying & fast pace walking
  • Having mini tantrums, racket cracking or mindless fast walking/play
  • Forgetting the basic ball striking functions
  • Allowing the opponent or situation to control your playing speeds