Tag Archives: positive mind set

Solutions to Optimism in Athletes

Posted on February 17, 2018 by in Emotional Aptitude in Sports, Emotional Tennis, Maximizing Tennis Potential

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

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Optimism, Mindsets and Life Skills

 

SOLUTION #2: Shift from Negative to Positive Development

In academia, there’s a movement called positive psychology – a commitment to building and improving one’s best qualities.  Instead of focusing exclusively on repairing your weaknesses, the positive psychology movement focuses also on improving your strengths. To succeed at the higher echelons of each sport, major strengths have to be nurtured. Though I am not implying that weakness doesn’t have to be strengthened, I am suggesting that major gains can also be made by improving an athlete’s strengths.

Research shows that life skills development is a byproduct of an athlete’s mindset. Without the proper mindset, improvement in all areas of life is a constant internal struggle. First, let’s clarify the difference between fixed and growth mindsets.

Fixed Mindset: The belief that talent and intelligence are inborn.

Growth Mindset: The belief that talent and intelligence can be developed throughout a lifetime.

With this concept in mind, let’s expose why a growth mindset is a necessity in high-performance sports.  Throughout this book, I’ll be illustrating both positive and negative developmental strategies by sharing an informal observational study of two of my students, Evan and Jarrod. The teens are identical twins from Southern California. While their genetics and upbringing are indistinguishable, the boys possess very different personality profiles and views of how this world works.

Let’s see how Evan and Jarrod answer the following developmental questions and how nurturing emotional aptitude actually changes one of the twin’s mindset …for the better.

Question: What’s your mindset and does it determine your behavior?

Evan: I think I have a growth mindset. I can’t imagine anyone thinking they already know it all…about everything.

Jarrod: Well, everyone tells me I’m super smart. So I guess I’m special. If you’re naturally smart and more athletic, sports are simple. So that must mean I have a fixed mindset, right?

 

Question: What motivates you to compete at a high level?

Evan: I enjoy the challenge of improving. Competing against the best demands I grow both as an athlete and a person. I see competition as an information gathering mission. I learn from losses.

Jarrod: I’m just naturally good at everything. I don’t have to work as hard as others, so I guess I am motivated to compete with the best to show them my awesome skills.

 

Question: In competition, what happens to you when you hit a major setback?

Evan: This is where my growth mindset kicks into gear. I love problem-solving. Those moments push me to grow.

Jarrod: My parents think I quit trying when things don’t go my way. They think I’m not motivated to fight. I hate to admit it, but when it seems like my opponent is going to win, I lose interest in competing and I emotionally quit. I guess it’s to protect my ego or something…

 

Question: Do you think feedback from coaches and parents is helpful?

Evan: Yes, I like it when they compliment me on my effort the most. But it interests me to hear all their observations. It helps me improve.

Jarrod: I typically don’t welcome feedback. I pretty much know why I won or lost. I don’t need their comments…I’m smart, remember?

By reading the initial Q & A from the twins, you can see how one’s mindset affects everything. It’s important to note that the individual’s fixed or growth mindset determines critical life development. The good news is that fixed mindsets don’t have to be permanent. Athletes are not chained to their old belief systems. In my 30 years of working with National Champions, I’ve found that winners are the ones who choose to master their sport. Mastery stems from devoting your heart and soul, which is emotional aptitude. The beauty is that developing a growth mindset improves not only the athlete’s career but their attitude, relationships, and health.

 

 

EMOTIONAL SKILL SETS- Replacement Theory

Posted on December 18, 2017 by in Raising Athletic Royalty

The following post is an excerpt from Raising Athletic Royalty NOW available through most online retailers!
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EMOTIONAL SKILL SETS

LESSON: The Replacement Theory

Zoe is a gifted basketball player. She’s wired with great hands. Sports scientists call her body type: fine motor skill dominate. Her father John played NCAA D-3 ball 25 years ago and is her personal coach. He had thrown in the towel on her basketball career because he felt she didn’t have what it took. John said, “I point out to her everything that she’s doing wrong but she never fixes it!” John demanded Zoe do everything his way, despite the fact that they had opposing personality profiles and body types.

At the eleventh hour, Zoe’s mom brought her to see me,

After completing our initial evaluation session it was clear to me that her weakest component was stamina, not just physical, but mental and emotional stamina.

When Zoe got winded, her movement and spacing got sloppy and she went off script with her low percentage shot and passing selections because she was too winded to stay in the moment. More importantly, her emotions went volatile. Zoe confided in me that her parents tell her each day that she has to lose weight. Several coaches told her the same thing. So why didn’t she? Unfortunately, she was told the problem multiple times but never the solution to the problem.

After I watched a video clip of her game day performance, we went to the clubhouse. I grabbed two ice teas and we sat on the couch and customized a plan.  I helped Zoe understand that she didn’t need another coach to teach her fundamentals. She actually needed to replace the outdated training regimens and poor eating habits with a customized developmental plan and new healthy eating habits.

The solution lies in understanding that just saying STOP to most problems simply doesn’t work. The key is to replace the bad habits with powerful new good habits.

Zoe proceeded to make a detailed list of everything she ate for the past week. We systematically swapped those meals and snacks with healthier choices. Within 6 weeks Zoe dropped her initial 20 lbs. Along with that, her new deliberate training cleaned up her flaws and her attitude improved as well. She worked her brand new customized developmental plan weekly. Six months later, Zoe was about 40 lbs. lighter and honored with the teams most improved player award.

This replacement theory works wonders for the emotional components found in high-performance sports. Just telling your youngster to stop being negative without replacing the situation with a new positive approach simply doesn’t work. Negatives don’t just stop cold turkey because we spot them; negatives must be systematically replaced by positive new habits. Successful athletes are solution oriented and not problem oriented.

 

“THE CURE USED TO DEFEAT REOCCURRING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS IS TO REPLACE THE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS WITH OPTIMISTIC THOUGHTS. JUST SAYING STOP DOES NOT WORK IN THE LONG RUN.”

 

Opportunity

Posted on September 21, 2017 by in Raising Athletic Royalty

https://The following post is an excerpt from Raising Athletic Royalty NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

Raising Athletic Royalty

OPPORTUNITY

 

“BEING GIVEN GREAT OPPORTUNITIES BEFORE THE HARD WORK IS PUT IN IS LIKE RECEIVING A GIFT YOU CANNOT OPEN.”

 

“Champions train like champions way before they ever become champions.”

 

“POSITIVE PEOPLE WITH A ‘CAN DO’ ATTITUDE SEEM TO SEEK OUT AND FIND MORE OPPORTUNITIES.”

 

“The winning order for success is preparation, opportunity, and execution.”

Building Belief

Posted on August 9, 2017 by in Emotional Tennis, Raising Athletic Royalty

The following post is an excerpt from Raising Athletic Royalty NOW available through most online retailers!
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 Raising Athletic Royalty Cover-3 FINAL

BELIEF

“Once the parent and the player are mature enough to let go of the outcome of competition (winning or losing), the player is then free to focus on preparing and performing to the best of their ability (peak level).”

 

“TEACH BELIEF EVEN MORE THAN TECHNIQUE.”

 

“Belief comes from success. Always playing your child up may get them comfortable losing.”

 

“YOUR PLAYER WILL BELIEVE WHAT YOU PREACH- BOTH POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE. IF YOU ARE ALWAYS SHARING WHAT’S WRONG, YOUR PLAYER WILL DEEPLY BELIEVE THAT THEY’RE ALWAYS…. WRONG.”

 

“The most important life skill to foster every day is belief.”

 

“BELIEVE IN WORKING HARDER AND SMARTER AND CONFIDENCE WILL ENSUE.”

 

Gently Pushing Your Athlete

Posted on February 20, 2015 by in Tennis Parent Education, The Tennis Parent's Bible

The following post is an excerpt of The Tennis Parent’s Bible.  Thank you for visiting, Frank Giampaolo

The Tennis Parent's Bible by Frank Giampaolo

How do you push your child gently?

Frequently, parents get fixated on what our junior “world beater” is doing wrong, what they need to change, need to learn or need to improve! Because we are so focused on our child’s success, we often become preoccupied with only seeing their faults.

Focus on putting a positive spin in your approach as you gently guide your child through the “wars” of junior tennis.

Here are three ways you can apply your positive influence:

  1. Say 5 Positive comments for every Negative commentThe fact is many youngsters only hear their parent’s negative comments and ignore positive comments. It is important to acknowledge your child’s efforts to improve.
    SPECIAL NOTE: Here’s an eye opening or I should say “ear” opening trick. Place a recorder in your pocket. Record a few training sessions and self-chart your positive to negative remarks!
  2. Celebrate the Positive: Reinforce what you want to see more!The following is an example of this rule. Your son’s ball toss is still too high on his serve. Instead of saying “Come on Mike…You are still tossing too high…How many stinking times do I have to tell you!” say “Hey, this is great, your toss is a lot lower. I knew you could make this easy change! Keep working and you will see your consistency really grow!” The positive approach actually gets results as you keep your relationship from getting negative and jaded.
  3. Teach Gratitude: A more positive attitude will lead to more positive behavior.Assist your child in focusing on the good things about their life. Problems and difficulties will always be present. It is very important for your child to feel grateful about their life opportunities.
    FUN FACT: There is a world of difference between “I have to play tennis today” and “I get to play tennis today.”
    By showing gratitude, both of you will be calmer, happier and more appreciative of each other and others will want to be around you because of your positive attitudes.

To summarize, replace criticisms with a more positive approach. Hard work doesn’t have to be a painful, drudgery. Yes, tennis is hard. Yes, it is a “dog-eat-dog world”, but it doesn’t have to be negative.

Contact: Frank Giampaolo
FGSA@earthlink.net
www.MaximizingTennisPotential.com
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Tame Negative Thoughts

Posted on January 30, 2015 by in Maximizing Tennis Potential, Raising Athletic Royalty, The Tennis Parent's Bible

Athletic royalty requires  a positive mind set.  It is essential players learn to tame negative thoughts to maximize potential. Thank you for visiting, Frank Giampaolo

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The Tennis Parent's Bible by Frank Giampaolo

 

SOLUTIONS TO “TAMING” NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

Self-talk is an essential high performance tennis skill. The following are twelve solutions to over-coming negative thoughts:

  1. Say Something Good/Positive

On the practice court, ask your child to rehearse finding something they did well on each point. This will shift their energy and focus from the negative to positive. The thoughts you feed tend to multiply. Multiplying the positive is a learned behavior. This rule applies to parents as well as players! Here’s an example: I teach a 14 year old ranked junior that has a terrific 128 mph serve. As he was “nailing” his serve into the box, all his father could say was “ya, but look at his knee bend, it’s pitiful…etc.” Ouch

  1. Education is Not Completed in the Lesson.

The most important lessons are taught in tournament play. They are analyzed in match logs. Assist your child in completing a match log after each match. Match logs are great for deciphering the X’s and O’s of why your child is getting their results. Solutions are found in match logs. The poised even tempered players have pre-set solutions rehearsed and designed for their future on court problems. Match logs identify the reoccurring nightmares. In anger management, prevention is the best medicine.

  1. Rehearse Successful Performance Goals Versus “I Have to Win” Outcome Goals

Champions are performance orientated not outcome orientated. In a single match, professionals think about the same hand full of patterns a thousand times, irritated juniors think about a thousand different things in the same single match! After blowing a lead I ask our players “What were you thinking about when you went up 5-2?” The answer is almost always future outcome issues such as “what’s my ranking going to be after I beat this guy.”Parents need to be performance goal oriented as well. After a match parents need to replace “Did you win?” with “How did you perform?” In the 2009 Masters Doubles, one ATP team got 81% of their first serves in and capitalized on 3 out of 4 break points. By looking at the performance chart/goals only, guess who won easily? Now, that’s thinking like a champion.

  1. Tennis is Not Fair

There are so many reasons why this game is not fair. Understanding these issues will reduce the stress some juniors place on themselves. For instance, luck of the draw, court surfaces, match locations, elements like weather, wind, lucky let courts, miss-hit winners, creative line callers…Can you think of a few?

  1. Everyone Gets the Same 24 Hours in a Day

The difference is how they use it.  I suggested getting a daily planner and discuss time management with your child. Assist them in organizing their on-court and off-court weekly schedule. Avoiding anger on match day is earned on the practice court. Most often, players seeing red shouldn’t be mad at their match performance. They should be upset with their pre-match preparation. Poise, relaxed performers are confident with their skills because they deeply believe they are doing everything in their power to prepare properly. I’ve found that players that are breathing fire in matches know, deep down, that they are now paying the price for their lack of preparation.

  1. Managing Stress

In the heat of battle, experience tells us that if you are struggling take a moment to detach. Often appearing unflappable is the tool needed to send the opponent over the edge. The opponent will appear calm as long as you are the one throwing temper tantrums. If you are steamed, fake it until you make it! Simply pretend to be unruffled. Parent’s this applies to you as well. Detach during your child’s match by going for a brisk walk, read the paper, chart the match or listen to your ipod. This sends the message that you are not overly stressed about the results. Take a moment and talk to your child about time management as it pertains to controlling the pace of the match. Winners absolutely control the pace of the match. Think back, top seeds often take bathroom breaks at critical times in a match, don’t they? Controlling the energy flow of the match is a super way to control the fire!

  1. Champions Experience Failure

Discuss how most tennis champions have probably lost way more matches than your child has lost. Ambitious people experience many failures. California’s Vania King’s professional career single results- similar number of wins and loses. But she has also won 2 WTA GRAND SLAM Doubles titles and has earned over 3 million in prize money.   Great job Vania! (Champions learn from losses.)

  1. Never Outgrow Fun

You often see top professionals battle and still smile in the course of a match. The vintage Vic Braden slogan “Laugh & win” makes perfect sense! Stress and anger clutter your thought processes; pull you into the wrong side of your brain which destroys your problem solving ability; irritates, tightens and constricts muscle flow which decreases your swing speed as well as your on court movement and/or simply destroys your ability to perform.

  1. Tennis is a Gift Not a Right

Discuss how there are millions of great athletes the same age as your child that will never even get the opportunity to compete at this level. Tennis isn’t fair, right? But has your child thought about how lucky they are to be able to play tennis and have a family that wants to support their passion?

  1. If Good Judgment Comes From Experience Where Does Experience Come From?

The answer is Bad Judgment. It is far less painful to learn from others failures. After a tournament loss, don’t race home steaming mad. Instead, stay at the tournament site and observe a top seed. Replace focusing on the strokes with analyzing the easy going attitudes as well as the infuriated, angry behaviors. Remind your child that an unflappable, quiet opponent is far more difficult and annoying to compete against than a wild angry one.

  1. Rehearse Ignoring Their Negative Thoughts

Ask your child to allow you to video tape a few matches. As they watch them back, ask your child to count the times they had a negative thought, loss of concentration or an emotional breakdown on the court. Now, here’s the solution. Ask them to simply reduce that number by 25% in next week’s video match. If done properly, negative on-court behavior will be weeded out or reduced.

  1. The Door to Success is Always Marked “Push”

Ask your child if they are always pushing themselves to their fullest potential? Remind them that there are thousands of really good juniors. There are only a handful of great juniors. From a parents’ perspective, if you do not push gently everyday (or pay someone to do the daily pushing) your child does not have a shot!

Thanks, Frank Giampaolo

Contact:Frank Giampaolo
FGSA@earthlink.com
MaximizingTennisPotential.com
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