Tag Archives: tennis

Performance Anxiety Symptoms And Causes – Part 3

Posted on December 27, 2018 by in Maximizing Tennis Potential

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Orderblack_ebook_design2

Solutions and Cures

Individual personalities come with unique frustration tolerance levels. So it’s safe to say that symptoms and cures are often remarkably different. Listed below are the anxiety-reducing strategies that I teach my students to handle pressure. Set aside time to discuss the below 6 performance anxiety busters with your team.

1) Pre-match preparation is essential. Prepare all strokes, patterns, one’s physical body and one’s state of mind properly before each match. Top professionals have a specific routine before and after every match.
2) Keep your self-destruction notes handy. The mental section provided you with a list of ten “Self-Destruction Solutions.”
3) To avoid choking and panicking requires understanding the under arousal, ideal performance and the over arousal state of minds.
4) Emotional toughness is being bigger than the moment. This state of mind requires three months of practicing in the manner in which you are expected to perform versus simply hitting tons of balls back and forth.

 

Performance Anxiety Symptoms And Causes – Part 1

Posted on December 18, 2018 by in The Tennis Parent's Bible

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

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Performance anxieties appear in a broad spectrum. Some athletes seem to fear nothing…some fear everything. Most have their personal anxiety triggers that should be discovered and examined. If you suspect that your child is experiencing excessive performance anxiety, it’s time to look at the common signs. If your athlete’s lack of personal belief is over-riding their actual ability then they’re battling performance anxiety which is part of the emotional development of the game.

 

“Emotional Development is just as important as stroke development.”

The Real Talent Is Emotional Toughness- Part 3

Posted on November 9, 2018 by in Emotional Aptitude in Sports, Maximizing Tennis Potential

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

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After reading this book, it is my hope that you, the athlete, understand a simple concept- to strengthen emotional aptitude, you must take deliberate customized action and set aside time to focus on improving yourself each and every day. Not just improving your game …Not just improving your swing… But improving yourself, which is the essence of emotional stability.

 

Simply improve yourself… And your game will improve.

 

Most athletes live in their “Comfort Zone” –  doing what everyone else appears to be doing, playing it safe, not taking risks or sticking to the road of least resistance. I urge you to leave that false belief system and venture into the “Learning Zone” – doing what’s uncomfortable, choosing the unknown and often more difficult path, trying methods that are new to you or exploring new ideas. If you read this book and then return only to your old, comfortable training methods, it is unlikely your will get the results you are capable of achieving.

Each section of this book, from the solutions to the story telling, is essentially assisting you in doing something extremely difficult … and that something is change. I’m not talking about changing your equipment, your environment or your coaches, I’m talking about changing your routines and rituals. Many athletes may say they want to improve but their words do not match their actions.

To improve you must be WILLING to acquire new routines and rituals and to be DISCIPLINED with their implementation.

 

Any great coach knows that an athlete’s rituals predicts their success or failure.

 

In storytelling, it is my intention to invoke an emotional response which leads to resourcefulness.

That’s why the experiences of the twins; Evan and Jarrod, resonate. Their opinions connect because their stories are all too familiar. Even though their comments represent both positive and negative points of view, their voices are a call to action.

I’d like to offer a warning for those not quite ready to commit to self-improvement. Please don’t expect your results to dramatically change without transforming your emotional aptitude.

 

Self-discipline is doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to do it.

 

For those of you who are ready to make emotional aptitude improvements a priority, congratulations, you are on the road to making your dreams a reality. Commit to the process and begin organizing your customized action plan. Each day specify the time needed to begin your metamorphosis.

 

Dabbling here and there in the developmental process is procrastination and is not a proactive life skill. Maximizing potential begins with maximum commitment.

Recognize that change can be uncomfortable and painful in the beginning. It may even be chaotic and stressful in the thick of it.  But change is incredibly rewarding and oh so sweet in the end.

Rethinking Stress- Part 4

Posted on October 12, 2018 by in The Soft Science of Tennis

The following post is an excerpt from Frank’s newest book, The Soft Science of Tennis. Click Here to Order through Amazon

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The Antidote for Emotional Sustainability

Remaining in the right frame of mind throughout an athlete’s journey is emotional persistence. Most often, future behavior is driven by emotional reasons. This is why reminding yourself daily of the positive motivational forces is so important. Take 10 minutes each day to focus on gratitude. Simply being thankful for your environment, your possessions, your friends, family, and coaches helps keep your athletic achievements in a healthy perspective.

 

Gratitude is a quick 10 minute cleansing of the soul.

 

Studies show that meditating for 10 minutes daily with the focus on your blessings helps ward off stress and feelings of being overwhelmed. I’ve read many experts in the field of psychology encouraging us to rethink meditation. Let go of the old school image of a Tibetan monk wrapped in a red robe sitting on a mountain and replace it with a new definition, which is the thought of a daily mental, emotional cleansing.

Rethinking Stress- Part 3

Posted on October 9, 2018 by in The Soft Science of Tennis

The following post is an excerpt from Frank’s newest book, The Soft Science of Tennis. Click Here to Order through Amazon

Soft Science of Tennis_3D_Cover_version5

 

How to Perform Better In High-Pressure Situations

Extraordinary athletes have all found a way to perform in high-pressure environments. One re-occurring theme in this book is that the cleanest fundamentals (in practice) are of zero value if the athlete can’t access them when they need them the most.

The solution to dealing with the high pressure of competition is to begin to re-label pressure situations. Instead of calling it a stressful time, say, “Here we go, it’s a challenging time!” Flipping a negative mental approach into a challenging positive approach provides the athlete with an attainable goal.  By making a conscious effort to replace the focus on what you DON’T want to happen (don’t choke, don’t overthink, don’t miss, and don’t lose) with positive imagery of what you Do want to happen, you will be pre-setting success.

To illustrate how your thoughts control your actions, try this old-school psychological exercise: Repeat to yourself 10 times: “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,”  “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza,” “I don’t want piping hot cheesy pizza.” After the tenth time. Close your eyes. What subconsciously enters your brain? PIZZA!

 

Often the more you try to suppress a thought, the more you strengthen it.

 

By thinking about negative thoughts before performing, we are “willing” negative results. Studies reveal that if we replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts, our brain will over-ride the negative beliefs. Going into competition without positive mental imagery, such as top pattern play, allows the mind to wander. So to perform better in high-pressure situations, it is imperative for an athlete to trust their training and to fill their thoughts with positive pattern play.

Remember, stress is inherent in athletic competition. But it’s how you choose to let it control your performance that typically separates the extraordinary athletes from the rest of the field.

 

Rethinking Stress- Part 2

Posted on October 6, 2018 by in The Soft Science of Tennis

The following post is an excerpt from Frank’s newest book, The Soft Science of Tennis. Click Here to Order through Amazon

Soft Science of Tennis_3D_Cover_version5

Basic Stress Management Strategies

  • Apply physical activity to burn off excess stress hormones- go for a short run before checking in to the event.
  • Apply relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, yoga or meditation.
  • Flip the negative frame of mind with a more positive frame of mind.
  • Set aside time for non-competitive hobbies, such as playing a musical instrument or reading a motivational book.
  • Get plenty of sleep and eat a healthy, balanced diet.
  • Understand that viewing stress as a positive builds confidence.

Rethinking Stress – Part 1

Posted on October 4, 2018 by in The Soft Science of Tennis

The following post is an excerpt from Frank’s newest book, The Soft Science of Tennis. Click Here to Order through Amazon

 

Rethinking StressSoft Science of Tennis_3D_Cover_version5

A very common view within the athletic community is that stress is the enemy in competition- the more stress felt, the worse the performance. Essentially believing that nothing good comes from stress.  But this belief couldn’t be further from the truth. Stress is actually very beneficial to the competitive athlete. Athletes who accept that stress is part of competition, are actually healthier competitors and much more likely to succeed.  How one views competition, ultimately determines the effects that stress has on their performance. In fact, on the playing fields, chasing excellence is better for your well-being than trying to avoid the stress (pain) of competition.

Let’s join up with Evan and Jarrod one last time. This time to discuss their take on the stress of competition.

 

Question: How does stress in competition effect performance?

Evan: When I feel stressed, my heart beats faster, raising my adrenaline levels and pumping more oxygen throughout my body.  I see stress as a plus- preparing me for the battle. Stress tells me it’s “GO TIME” and I focus better. Without the stress, there wouldn’t be extra hormones running through my body giving me an extra boost.

Jarrod: In the past, when I’m freaking out … My stomach hurt and I became irritable, overwhelmed and angry. All I would think about is the outcome and I panicked and choked.  I guess I chose to go that route. I used to be an
idiot …

Frank’s Tip: Stress isn’t the culprit. It’s how individuals choose to view the stress. If you’re a bit like Jarrod, it is time to apply stress management solutions to help you flip your attitude and learn to use stress to improve your performance.

 

Final thoughts on Evan and Jarrod: I had a feeling that Evan would help provide young athletes with an optimistic, solution based voice coming from their peer group. Honestly, I was very worried about Jarrod in the beginning of this process. I speculated wrongly that his narcissistic views couldn’t be swayed. As we dug deeper into the benefits of emotional aptitude, Jarrod slowly but surely changed his rigid stance and began to accept this developmental process. I couldn’t be more pleased that Jarrod is now on board.

Stop Worrying About What Others Think -Part 3

Posted on September 25, 2018 by in Emotional Aptitude in Sports

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

ea-in-sports4a_final

 

Focus On Improving Yourself Versus Proving Yourself

 

  • Stop Wasting Energy Worrying About What Others Think. Others’ perception of you isn’t based on you. It’s more likely based on their fears of you overtaking them.

 

  • Realize That Rivals Are Probably Not Thinking About You Anyway. Here’s a shocker… Rivals are most likely worrying about what you’re thinking of them and not the other way around. Imaginary scenarios of what your opponent is thinking is basically a figment of your imagination and shows a lack of emotional maturity and childlike insecurities.

 

  • Remember That Strangers Don’t Really Know You. Even if your rivals form a “superficial hatred” of you, it is most likely a result of fear and jealousy rather than facts. They’re actually complicating their life by wasting energy on non-productive dramas.

 

  • Enjoy Being You. Strive to be the individual others secretly emulate and/or gossip about. The National Enquirer and other gossip magazines generate millions of dollars monthly in this practice. Be grateful that you’re viewed as a threat and that is why they’re on the attack.

 

  • Flip Your Focus From How Your Rivals Feel, To How You Should Be Feeling. Emotional aptitude requires prioritizing one’s thoughts to the moment at hand. Thinking less often trumps over-thinking about inappropriate contaminants. Letting go of judgment is an important choice that will enable athletes to perform free.

 

  • Trust Your Positive Moral Code. Do the right thing. Make the right choices. By having a solid moral code it allows you to trust your decisions. A positive strong moral code upsets rivals because it raises you above them and takes the emotional power away from them.

 

  • There’s Always Another Naysayer. Even if you cater to a naysayer and put your needs behind theirs…guess what? There is always going to be another one to take their place. Honestly, the better the athlete gets, the more the critics want their say…

 

Worrying Is a Choice

My neighbor’s golden retriever, Lacy, got out the other night. Sadly she was struck by a car. My other neighbor, Mrs. Johnson, was taking out the trash and witnessed the incident. Without hesitation, she ran into her garage, grabbed towels and immediately took charge. She called 911, then like a well-trained athlete, she went to work calming Lacy down, cleaning her cuts and broken leg until help arrived.

During her heroic mission, Mrs. Johnson didn’t worry about what others were thinking. She didn’t wonder if the bystanders thought she was doing it right. She didn’t worry about what they thought about the worn out old towels she was using. She didn’t give her old tattered housecoat or her messy hair a second thought…

The intensity of the situation motivated her to choose not to care what others might think. The story of Mr. Johnson and Lacy demonstrate that thinking about what others are thinking about … is only a choice.

 

 

Stop Worrying About What Others Think – Part 2

Posted on September 21, 2018 by in Emotional Aptitude in Sports

 The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order 

ea-in-sports4a_final

 

Question: How did you let go of the need for approval?

Evan: I finally realized that my friends weren’t interested in helping me achieve my goals. They could care less about me. I began to understand that my parents were my number one fans- continuing to support and nurture self-belief, self-confidence, and self-reliance. I also learned to trust and respect those that were looking out for my best interest, which included my private coach.  With the support of my team, I was able to let go of looking for approval and instead commit to striving to be the best I could be both as an athlete and as a person.

Jarrod: I guess I’m finally ready to really commit to myself. My constant need for approval from those that could care less about my goals seems crazy…  I don’t know what I was thinking.  Maybe I wasn’t thinking! I’m going to make the effort to change. You said a fixed mindset personality can change to having a growth mindset, right? I am ready to forget about pleasing others and commit to my goals!

 

Constantly worrying about pleasing others takes away time and energy from improving yourself.

 

To maximizing potential you must take the leadership role in your customized developmental plan. Like Evan, it is essential to surround yourself with those that support, respect and encourage positive life skills. Athletic success requires a team that mutually respects each other and their roles. It is also important to eliminate the influence of those with a fixed mindset because improvement stems from a growth mindset.

Decisions regarding your athletic career should be based solely on the continual assessments of individual strengths and weaknesses – period!

 

The problem with approval seeking is that it holds your emotions captive. Some athletes have difficulty focusing on their own strengths because they’re constantly worrying about meeting the standards and expectations of others.

 

Stop Worrying About What Others Think- Part 1

Posted on September 18, 2018 by in Emotional Aptitude in Sports

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

ea-in-sports4a_final

 

Stop Worrying About What Others Think

 

One of the leading causes of performance anxiety is worrying about what others think. This unproductive energy zapper is a choice and an incredibly bad choice at that! This section will prove why. Let’s call on the twins, to see how they view worrying about what others think about them.

 

Question: Does the opinion of other players, coaches and/or parents matter to you?

Evan: Well, what’s right for someone else may be completely wrong for me.  I’d rather let go of both the good and bad opinions and simply have faith in my skills. This is emotional aptitude, right Frank? Trusting your own opinions, decisions, abilities, and living on your own terms?

Jarrod: In the past I wanted the better players to like me, so I actually unknowingly tanked my matches with them. I respected them too much. I just let them win.  I wasn’t sure why. I thought if I let them win… they’d like me. Kind of crazy, right? Now after talking about this emotional aptitude stuff, I realize that the fastest way to be liked is by beating them.

 

Question: Is the need to be accepted by other athletes holding you back?

Evan: I love being part of a team, but tennis isn’t a team sport. It’s an individual sport. I let go of the need to be accepted years ago and decided it’s in my best interest to customize my training. It’s not that I don’t enjoy the socialization of group training, but if that’s all I did, I would definitely be an average player, at best!

Jarrod: When I was young and naïve, I believed the other athletes in the group when they said that the group clinic was their only training. Later, I realized that they often snuck away and did extra private lessons to secretly get ahead of the rest of us. Pretty sneaky huh?

 

Question: Is the need for peer approval holding you hostage?

Evan: When I was in junior high, I procrastinated and avoided doing what’s right for me. I also wanted everyone to like me, so I tried to blend in and not stand out.  This limited my growth opportunities because I couldn’t get better and with an average work ethic. I was exhausting trying to please the cool people.

Jarrod: I am finally seeing how emotional aptitude really is important. I used to try to do too much- never wanting to miss the fun. I would never say no. Looking back, trying to please all my non-athletic friends really hurt my development.